Friday, November 25, 2016

I Scour the Internet: The Post Thanksgiving, Pre Season Premiere of Sister Wives Edition for November 26th, 2016

Can you believe it? Sister Wives is returning for yet another season of fun. Ho hum. Just another lackluster season no doubt with a lot of hype (insert sound bite of Kody saying "This was a mistake to be filmed" with Kody looking dumb and Meri looking distraught) that usually never seems to make it to the final edit of the show.

You got to hand it to the show's producers. They certainly understand how to bait and switch, don't they?

Of course, the online tabloids being fueled by "insider information" provided by Robyn's former business partner, friend, and personal JYD has done a lot to super-hype this new season with varied announcements proclaiming how Kody is in debt for six figures, Robyn wants a divorce, and Christine wants to gouge out Robyn's eyes (say WHAT?).

All I've got to say is this is old news. Is that the only dirt Robyn's former JYD can dredge up on the Browns? Surely there is something more, like how cray cray life is living in the cul-de-sac with man-child Kody pretending, to the best of his abilities, to be the reality world's star Polygamist. Right?

Uncle Art is in the middle.
Frankly, I'd rather watch old Uncle Art Hammon from Polygamy, USA. His throwing his nasty boot at a missionary's head was entertainment, the stuff that makes reality shows fun to watch.

Watching Kody stumble his way through life making some of the most hairbrain decisions is, well, like watching mold grow. At least with the mold you might get something useful like penicillin.


But judging from the few seconds of what this new season might show, all I can say is...please, enough about Meri and the catfish. It's been over and done with for over a year. I'm hoping the snippet showing a crying Meri and a blank faced Kody will not make it to our TV screens this season. But of course, if Meri finally comes clean she WAS going to leave Kody for Sam the Sham, I'll be glued to my TV.

Before we venture into Twitter lala land, please allow me a moment of whimsy. I just watched a Wild Turkey commercial with Matthew McConaughey who now has my vote to portray Kody Brown if they ever make a movie about Sister Wives. Oh, and my vote for Meri would be Frances McDormand with a heavy slathering of orange bronzer on her face. What do you think? Hey, they are both Oscar winners. This would be a defining career move for them, right?

He's got Kody hair!

And McDormand already owns a Meri Jacket!

Oh yeah. I think we have a winner here!! And keeping with Oscar winners, Angelina Jolie can portray Robyn.

"I'm the best friend a sisterwife or junkyard dog could ever want!"

My contenders for Jangle and Christine would be Melissa McCarthy and Kate Winslett, also Oscar winners.

"Peanut butter WHAT?"
Winslett would make the perfect blue-blood polygamist!

Alright, enough of the Oscar winners, let's get down to the Browns and their tweets. Yeah, I know it's a dirty job, but someone's got to do it.

Can we talk about MSWC, you know, Robyn's business venture that has never really gotten off the ground. Well, guess what? Someone had the smarts to  sell that over-priced, iconic, junk jewelry (designed by Kody and Robyn) at a loss...I mean a deep discount of 70% off, just in time for the season premiere AND Christmas!




Wait, did I read that correctly? Gone for good? Does this mean MSWC will be shuffling off to the celestial kingdom when the inventory is gone? Wow, I am totally surprised....NOT. I have a feeling Robyn (and her CEO husband Kody) won't be able to GIVE AWAY that crapastic junk, let alone sell it. Wishful thinking on their part!

On the subject of Robyn, someone let her tweet without supervision again. Now, I have this theory (here, let me give you an hor d'oeuvre) that a TLC asked Robyn to get off her duff and tweet something about the show...maybe even address those tabloid rumors out on Google News to build hype for the premiere on Sunday. So Robyn does just that, except, she adds her own take on the situation...



Robyn... Robyn... ROBYN!!! The first three sentences were good, but that last one could have been left off. You see, Robyn dear (yes, I'm speaking directly to Robyn aka Mommie Dearest), you WANT people to tune into the show to see if the tabloids are right. By declaring the tabloids are spewing a bunch of lies means people will take your word for it (I know, I know that's a stretch) and decide NOT TO WATCH! A more effective sentence would be "I guess I should tune in on Sunday November 27th to find out for sure" or something like that. See what I mean. You are very welcome!

Let's mosey on over to more fun stuff. In case you haven't heard, Maddie has a bun in her oven. Meri's enthusiasm shows in this tweet...



Looks like it's going to be a while before Maddie finishes her college degree now. But she looks happy and healthy in her LulaRoe dress (courtesy of bonus mom Meri), doesn't she?

Of course, no word from Robyn about this newest development, but something tells me Maddie's delivery will get a lot more coverage than Robyn's Princess Ari-ola.

Which leads me directly to this typical all about Robyn's child tweet...




Sometimes you've just got to shake your head. She tries so hard to portray the role of the best mom, businesswoman and sisterwife on the planet, but in reality she's just another Mommie Dearest...




Jangle's newest endeavor has finally shown it's true face. Luckily, she's also having a Black Friday and Cyber Monday sale. You better load up while you can (and while it's cheap)!! Let's hope those emails arrive BEFORE Friday and Monday!






Jangle also properly hyped the season premiere on Sunday to her followers. Maybe she can give some pointers to her sisterwife Robyn?


And Mykelti also gets an article in People Magazine about her recent  wedding shower...well, at least she isn't marrying someone needing a green card...


Well, that's all for now. And remember, I Scour the Internet so you can join us during the season premiere of Sister Wives right here in my living room for the first Live Tweet Party of the season!



61 comments:

  1. I thoroughly enjoyed reading this post, Cynical. Nicely done!

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  2. "You got to hand it to the show's producers. *They certainly understand how to bait and switch, don't they?"*

    Truer words were never said... !!!

    CJ, Your intros are just "the best" !!!
    No exception on this one. Loved it !!

    And GREAT picks for actors potentially playing the Kodyworld folks for the big screen !! Ha!! Spot-on for all of them !!!
    Although...Melissa McCarthy would certainly have to dial back her natural effervescence to accurately play Jangle.

    Looking forward yet another (amazing, isn't it) season of snark here in the Living Room with you as the hostess and CEO reporter of all that is Brown BS.
    Favorite line of this edition ....still grinning...
    "At least with the mold you might get something useful like penicillin."

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    1. Thanks Amused, I appreciate it!

      I didn't know who Melissa McCarthy was until I saw Bridesmaid and even then I thought her character was kind of out there. And then there was that forgetable sequel in the bachelor party gone wrong genre where she was the daughter from hell. Almost unwatchable. But then I saw her in a movie called Saint Vincent with Bill Murray. Totally different characterization. So here's my plug y'all. Catch Saint Vincent on Showtime if you haven't already!

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    2. Agree, CJ !!
      Saint Vincent is well worth the watch. She is a diversely talented actress. And for those who know the movie Bridesmaid, I was surprised to learn that the guy who played the reluctant air marshal, and who winds up as her man, is her real life husband. They have co-written several scripts.

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    3. Agreed. Melissa McCarthy has way too much personality to be Janelle. They could probably just make a life-size wax figure and have that play Jangle. It's not like it needs to move or anything. It can just sit there.

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  3. I just tried to go to MSWC and got a threat warning pop up.

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  4. In the pre view clip when Meri says, " I'm here by myself, just doing my life no truer words for the demise of polygamy were spoken. She is in a culdesac with a large family with young children and she is by herself BY HER Choice. Why does she continue to whine on film about her isolation when it is self imposed???

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    1. I wish Meri would just leave the family! I feel like telling her to move back to Utah, be with your brothers and sisters, your mother. Nobody in her "fake" family supports her. They seem to just deal with her. She does not owe her life to be with them forever, if she is not happy in the cul de sac. All the women are selfish. They all want to be happy with Kody. They do not want their sister wives to be happy with Kody! because they want to be happy with him. Umm... conflict of interest!! I think Meri has surpassed the whole sharing of Kody. Do herself a favor, and let go of that useless, uncaring man.

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    2. It shows how the women in polygamy are "put out to pasture." One of many problems the public has with polygamy reinforced on the show. The show actually did the opposite of what it. There is only division, less that better people, competing for time and attention and emotional abandonment. The leadership doesn't really want it legalized. They can blame the unhappiness on the fact it's underground. I hope it is never legal. It's bad public policy. It denies men wives. It denies children their parents.

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    3. Hi Gang, I love reading all your posts. When Meri was talking to Kody I got the feeling that Meri felt abandoned by Kody especially after Meri got the divorce so Robyns kids could legally be adopted by Kody.Meri was trying to talk to Kodster and he kept referring to them seeing Nancy the preshrink. God he is such a dumb jack ass. There is no reason why Kody didn't divorce Robyn and remarry Meri. Roby really does have kody by the nutsack. Now about Mykelti's boyfriend. He is just weird and looks a little effeminate. JIMO. Jinxie as far as the movie and stars playing parts in The Kodester Movie Your choices for the actors playing parts was great. AJ as Robyn was spot on.
      All the best, til next tea time, Tessie

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  5. McConaughey as Kody isn't working for me, but Gary Busey would be a good choice!

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    1. Jeff Daniels is an excellent choice---although MrSpock most admires his turn as Gen. Joshua Lawrence Chamberlain in "Gettysburg." You can see him leading the 20th Maine's bayonet charge on Little Round Top in the 1993 movie on You Tube. But he is a good actor and could pull off the Kody role.

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    2. Jeff Daniels, Bill Pullman, Bill Paxton. I always get those three confused with each other for some reason!

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    3. I totally agree with Jeff Daniels for Kody and I must respectfully disagree with Angelina for Robyn. Evil or not, AJ does have a regal bearing that Sobbyn is sadly lacking. I don't think she could scruff herself down to Sobbyn's trailer-trash level. Helena Bonham Carter might be able to pull it off.

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    4. Oh yes Momofsquid! Helen Bonham Carter could probably portray each wife equally well!

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    5. Jeff Daniels yes indeed! We also have the cavemen from the Geico commercial as a runner up.

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  6. after seeing us magazine clip of Kody and Padron (Mykelties fiance) casting for Kody takes on new dimensions. Literally!!! He is FAT!! in the weirdest jeans ive ever seen on a man.What do these people eat????

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    1. Wow,thanks to you I watched it Milo,. What does Kody say- he does not want his grandchildren discouraged from polygamy. There you have it folks. He is hoping to indoctrinate the grandkids into the fold.How arrogant of him to ask others to live his beliefs.So much for respecting his kids choices.I wonder if Maddie's husband got this request.Think of it,you have 18 kids. They have 6 kids each even . That is a lot of potential polygamist material.He knows he can not control Antonio. He is already sabotaging their marriage in my opinion.

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    2. Maddie never even pretended to take her dad seriously. She has her own mind. Now Christine's kids are different, they would at least humor him. Remember the hormones. Kody would never give that speech to maddie.

      I actually would not be surprised if aspen or mariah were married in secret. If they decided to live polygamy their families they married into may not want the publicity.

      I don't think Kody really cares about who or when his daughters marry so long as they are adults. They are raised to leave. I think the producers are imagining drama.

      I think she will continue school. Her roots are Utah. Having a baby doesn't mean school ends. It's basically required to get married before finishing. It's true the stats are sad for wives but are better than other young mothers who haven't finished.

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  7. I love it here, and I love reading the things you all share, but as far as the show goes, I'm done. I can't even enjoy disliking them anymore. Everyone is so complacent. There's no hope for any real change or growth. Basically, there’s nothing to hang on to anymore. Maddie is the biggest let-down. Mykelti’s just another dunce. Before, I watched because I hoped at least the kids would make personal changes and escape that polygamist enculturation. Now they’re married fresh out of girlhood, and already popping out the pups. Nothing’s going to change for that family or its progeny. That essentially makes SW unwatchable for me. Who wants to see a bunch of people drown in their self-induced misery? It’s depressing as hell. I’ll always pop in to see what insightful things you guys have to say, but I do wish they’d pull the plug on SW; It’s been dead in the water for too long.

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    1. Ayumi, I'm with you. I quit watching before last season and got my fix by coming here. Watching the women turns my stomach and reminds me of watching abused women subjecting themselves over and over and over again. After watching the tears of these women, I realize those tears are not tears of happiness or even tears of empathy for their sister wives' situations but tears of sadness for their own crappy existence. And, on the other hand, their are those smirks that the wives give when one or more of the other wives piss them off or the passive aggressive digs. I just couldn't take it anymore. But, I love getting the goods here without having to subject myself to the bad acting of the wives as they try to portray their abuse as something they are digging the hell out of.

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  8. How are they going to justify shutting MSWC down when they have been saying it helps pay the bills/ feed the family/ been doing so well? We always suspected they were BSing but doubt they will admit that.

    How will they explain now trying Janelle's idea?

    Also, bet you Robyn is not so thrilled that Maddies pregnancy and child will
    probably take center stage now in both the show and the household.
    Wouldn't be surprised if she wants a comment comparing her pregnancies to Maddies.

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    1. I seen the recent youtube videos of Janelle. She does not look as if she lost weight. Yet, she wants to spew health advice. And her personal trainers are charging $780 for only 20 sessions.

      My local gym is cheaper with more sessions included in the price.

      As for Robyn. I doubt King Sol or Princess Ari would be replaced by Maddie's child. After all, Maddie's child is a product of a monogamous marriage. *Maybe* if Maddie went the polygamous route, Kody would be happy to include his 1st grandchild in the royal line up. In Kody's mind, polygamy is far superior than monogamy.

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  9. Nice to get an update on the Browns. My TV package doesn't include TLC and appreciate getting updates from you. Yah!

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  10. In the preview clip with Kody and Antonio (Mykelti's fiance) did anyone else catch the drama about Kody making the point to Antonio that the LDS church had rejected accepting Mykelti as a member?

    Apparently Antonio is a fairly recent convert from Catholicism to Mormon and Mykelti wants to join his church and was denied. I almost felt the conversation with Antonio was staged more to bring up this point than anything else. Kody and krew like to continue the persecution theme.

    I couldn't tell if it was even a real issue or not. Kody inferred Mukelti has been rejected for membership but Antonio centered the discussion more about not being able to "seal" their marriage in the Mormon temple because she was not baptized in the Mormon church. That is a different issue than being outright rejected as a member. I had some Mormon friends in school who were members in the LDS church but not allowed to marry in the temple. It is my understanding that not every couple is given permission to marry in the temple?

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    1. It is my understanding that not every couple is given permission to marry in the temple?

      From what I understand, to enter the Temple you must have a temple recommend. So no temple recommend means no temple wedding. Mykelti was probably told she would need to disassociate herself from her family's fundamentalist beliefs in order to eventually considered for the recommend (in good standing, meeting tithing requirements and no doubt a morality clause that excludes polygamy). Just like a typical Brown, she lost interest quickly...after all, to disassociate herself would mean no more TLC money paying for her wedding, wedding shower, and any other life event that can be turned into a storyline on Sister Wives.

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    2. Why are Maddie and Mykelti not allowed to be baptized in the LDS church but the oldest son from My Wives and 2 of the Darger kids were and even went on missions.

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    3. Yes I wonder the same and the Williams show themselves talking to him on his allowed call and waiting for his return .The Dargers went to visit a son in I believe San Francisco.One who was LDS.

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    4. "...after all, to disassociate herself would mean no more TLC money paying for her wedding, wedding shower, and any other life event that can be turned into a storyline on Sister Wives."

      And there in most likely lies the "real" (as in true reality) reason why Mykelti would not disassociate from the family's expressed beliefs!

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    5. The dargers are known locally while the Browns are known nationally. I think though you are thinking about the Brady's when you speak of kids who have gone on missions. Maddie didn't go on a mission. I have a feeling they would have been fine for her slaving for them for 18 months on her own dime. I applaud her for not dissociating with the family. They also were suing the state of Utah. She said since the first season and quite young no to polygamy. She always said that publicly. I hope she tries for community of Christ if she really buys into the joseph smith side of her religion. They are a latter day movement from his children that never had polygamy. But they are very tiny. You don't have to dissociate with your mob relatives to be Catholic. How goofy. The policy and then quick change regarding adults with homosexual parents in relationships shows just how goofy the whole thing is. Apparently there is more than individual sin or Adam's sin keeping a person in sin, your parents can't ever have practiced polygamy or be gay. How much control should a religion have over your life? It's part of the distinguishing trait of a cult to have you disassociate with family and friends. Huge mistake. Let's hope it goes the way of the priesthood and people of color and is temporary that minor and adult children of "sinners" need to go through another step for baptism than any other sinner with clean parents.

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    6. I'm pretty certain the Dargers son did go on a mission. I think it was to Taiwan because Papa Joe and wives travelled there and tweeted about it!

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    7. No I am speaking of the Dargers. You used to be able to get on their facebook page but now it is closed.One or two sons did missions. The Dargers were on the Sisterwives show and that made them nationally known.Have they not written a book too or a script for a movie? There has been mention of the JYD here on Cynical Jinx Livingroom . Brady Williams has a facebook page of his own ,not for fans. On October 20th post he is pictured visiting with Kody. Who should come on to comment but the JYD herself. Interesting timing to post if she is on the outs.Maybe that was all made up?In regards to religion having control,it seems to be all cake for the men.The women get the leftovers.Kody does nothing. Brady has how many kids and studied nothing leading to a J.O.B. As for Darger what does he do that he can afford a passel of kids?

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    8. I've would imagine mandatory tithing would send any Brown running. They don't even pay their bills. That and the TV money none of them will give up. After all, the apple does not fall far from the tree.

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    9. their bankruptcy papers say otherwise. janelle even spent pretty much the same on 'charitable donations' (i.e. tithing) as on food every month.gotta keep the cult in business!

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  11. MrSpock is of the opinion that the oft-cited "worst movie ever made"---i.e. "Plan 9 from Outer Space"---has more of a plot line than any conceivable plot for a Sister Wives movie. For those not familiar with that movie you can view the trailer on You Tube.

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    1. I'm proud to report that not only do I have Plan 9 in my Kindle movie library, I also have Glen or Glenda. While I was in college, I saw Glen or Glenda for the first time in an art movie theater and I was like what the hell...Later I learned it was an Ed Wood film, and that growing up I'd seen almost all of his monster films. And yes, I've watched the Johnny Depp Ed Woods movie about a thousand times.

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    2. Not familiar with Glen or Glenda---will have to look that up.

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  12. That pic from Mykelti's shower? Pure photoshop. Have a closer look...at least two of the women were photoshopped into the frame, probably to make it look like people actually attended her shower. Sad.

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    1. Mykelti only needs her family and cousins to fill the cuddle sac with bodies. The picture looks real to me, and I don't think Mykelti would have a problem getting people to attend her shower.

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    2. Photoshop? No.

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  13. I love these marathons because I get a ton done around the house.... the Browns are perfect background noise...I have to say it is very obvious that the show has run its course... they are going to have to do something to liven things up... I wish they would actually discuss their religion. The AUB has been in a complete upheaval since the "installation" of the new profit. Rosemary from "My 5 Wives" very publicly accused her Father, Lynn, who is the new prophet, of touching her inappropriatly. Rosemary's claim was not the only one...The fact that the "Priesthood Council" refused to formerly address any of the accusations, has caused almost 1/4 of the flock to leave the AUB. I'm assuming most are now "independent polygamists"... following the "Church of Dad" (that's a quote from Big Love when Sarah tells Ben he should continue going to LDS seminary class, because the only other option was the "Church of Dad")

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    1. I'm missing Big Love right now...

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    2. Oh, CJ...right there with you !!!
      Yes, so miss Bill and his harem !!

      Had TLC on briefly today to catch the couch chat where they all discuss the rigors of avoiding any hospital births due to the "questions" plygs must endure from hospital staff. Such BS !!
      But more impacting is the absurdity of listening to them whine about alleged plyg-bias from hospitals. Yet Christine and Sobbin willingly allowed a camera into their most intimate of moments...for $$$$ !!! Such Hypocrites !!
      And then probably my all time fav phony Sobbin/Meri scene played again where Sobbin, barely cleaned up from delivering Solomon, and kicking out the Idiot and her step-father (the guy who likes to watch labor and delivery) but *keeping the camera guy* then sobs the offer to lend Meri her uterus. Just had to snort yet again at that blatant bid for future ratings *right after *a birth.*
      SO many ridiculous scenes and plots.....so, so many !!

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    3. I watched that episode where Sobbin was giving birth to Aria. Doctor Kody was coming up with his take on science. "If she locks her knees she cuts off the circulation to her brain. And, l am in charge of getting oxygen into your brain. " IDIOT!

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    4. I watched that episode where Sobbin was giving birth to Aria. Doctor Kody was coming up with his take on science. "If she locks her knees she cuts off the circulation to her brain. And, l am in charge of getting oxygen into your brain. " IDIOT!

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  14. Oh man....this whole Kody keeps a kosher diet is absurd! I don't even know how the producers let that one slide...C'mon we've seen them throw a party for every fart for five years... and as I live and breathe, not a single one of their spreads was kosher (I won't even address the concept of keeping a kosher kitchen)...
    It's this kind of crap that makes Kody such a joke...I hate when they co-opt other cultures (the claddagh ring really irks me)

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  15. I'm amazed at the photo of Janelle, and guys that I assume are her 'trainers'. Remember when Kody had to follow the wives to the gym because he wanted to meet the man that would be the personal trainer for his wives? Remember how jealous he seemed to be about Christine talking to the trainer? Now Kody is okay with several men being up close and personal with Janelle?

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    1. He wanted to meet the man that would be the personal trainer for Robyn, he doesn't care who the other 3 are squatting with.

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    2. I say he wants to meet the man/men not because of any concerns for his wives but because I suspect he is a man in waiting in the closet and any chance to meet a man in shorts and with a sweat glistening body is a new vision for when he is tapping at the thighs of Robyn.....I know, pretty crude but these times require truths as much as we can assertion from their subtexts.....

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  16. Maddie looks amazing. Like she has lost 20 pounds...

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  17. Replies
    1. Thanks for the heads-up! That spam is now history!

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  18. CJ, thanks for the chance to scoop the news from the cuddle sack...Great information and love the actor pics.

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  19. Who is this woman interviewing during the season premier tell all? I'm not feeling her
    And why does the makeup always look worse on these tell all when you'd think they'd have a professional doctoring their faces for the close-ups? They even make Kody look scarier!

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  20. Here's an idea for the 4th wife, Farrah from Teen Mom. Can you just IMAGINE?

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  21. I am shocked that Tony was suggesting that a home equity loan should be taken out for his an mykelti's wedding. He is an opportunist and a scumbag. I studied Physical Linguistics back in the 1980's while studying law...and his facial movements and body language indicate a very dishonest person.

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  22. I also felt that when Mary and Kody were discussing their relationship...she could not bring herself to say....She wants a marriage including a sexual relationship. he plays dumb and says what would you want different? Whan an insensitive jerk!

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  23. i'm pretty sure i wrote this comment once before but CJ, what's up with saying "at least she isn't marrying someone needing a green card..." sounds a bit racist considering Tony's Mexican heritage, and in any case what would be wrong if some one wasn't a citizen of the US marrying someone who was? I know it's probably 'just a joke' but in this age of Trump's "build a wall" it's really disappointing to see this kind of mentality perpetuated.

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    1. i'm pretty sure i wrote this comment once before...
      I'm pretty sure you haven't, but go on...

      what's up with saying "at least she isn't marrying someone needing a green card..."
      I'm sorry, I thought everyone was familiar with another popular TLC reality series called 90 Day Fiance.

      what would be wrong if some one wasn't a citizen of the US marrying someone who was?
      Let's see. Off the top of my head Danielle Mullins Jbali and her Tunisian husband Mohammed Jbali. Mrs Jbali is now deep in regret of marrying her husband who recently posted about their sex life (or lack thereof) on his Facebook page and went so far as to bring the topic up on a 90 Day Fiance reunion telecast about a month ago. Oh did I mention Danielle now realizes her marriage was just a sham so Mo could get green card?

      I know it's probably 'just a joke'...
      A snarky attempt of a joke at that...being that Tony IS an American citizen and Mykelti could have hooked up with someone like Danielle's Mo who's main purpose for marrying a US citizen was to get his green card. AND that 90 Day Fiance is one of the more popular TLC reality shows. Go figure I'd mention it.

      Bottomline, thank you for bringing politics into my living room and implying I'm a racist. My day is now complete.



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