Sunday, April 23, 2017

Cynical Jinx Attends the Az Women's Expo!


What does Strive with Janelle and LuLaRoe have in common? Well, besides the Meri Brown connection, of course...

Why, the Arizona Women's Expo, of course!

And guess who was smack dab in mid-town Phoenix yesterday, just mere minutes from the Convention Center, via the light-rail transport system?

Yeppers, your's truly!!!

Three guesses how I spent my Saturday, and the first two guesses don't count!





Driving in downtown Phoenix is the pits. No joke, if you don't need to drive downtown you avoid the area like the plague. But now we have the Light-Rail, which makes life so much simpler. No more worries about overpriced parking lots! No more long walks in the dry Phoenix heat! OK, so it wasn't 100 degrees in the shade yet, but I think you get my point!

Unfortunately, Saturday was also Earth Day, and there were over 1000 people marching for Science around the block surrounding the convention center complex. Instead of a smooth arrival to the Convention Center light-rail station, we had a tense few minutes of "Why are we stopped" "Is that a parade?" "Holy moly! Look at all the people!" 

Luckily, the Light-Rail timetable took precedence over the March for Science participants, so we weren't delayed for long. Once we arrived at the Convention Center station, we found ourselves at an excellent vantage point to watch the marchers as they filed past us. Here are a few photos I took of the parade...






Once we safely made our way through (yes, we had to go through the parade to reach the Convention Center across the street) we had to figure out exactly which entrance we were supposed to use for the Expo.

That task done, and now inside the Convention Center, I noticed this huge Tequila Tasting booth and its bottles of Tequila on display.

I thought this was a Women's Expo. I expected booths of woman empowerment, not Tequila tasting. I half expected someone to start screaming over the PA system "Tequila is my lady, my lady!"

Thank goodness, that didn't occur. I will tell you that later in the day, that booth became very, very, popular!



As we slowly made our rounds, we turned a corner and what did we spy?

Oh My Gosh!!! It's a LULAROE booth!!



I couldn't help myself. I had to touch the leggings. And folks, those leggings were soft, just like... buttah.

Well, okay, like I've never really fondled butter so let's just say they were...very soft. And kind of thin. I secretly inspected the leggings for tell-tale holes or splits and found none. Checking the label, I saw they were manufactured in China. Hmmm....

The consultant was extremely nice. The long Carly was a size 1XL, which she assured me would fit. In fact, she suggested I even go down a size.

I know my body. Unlike the former legal Mrs Kody Brown who is also a LuLaRoe consultant, I'm not into a certain look, best described as the "ten pounds of sausage stuffed into a five pound bag" by a former Real Housewife of NJ reality star. I asked the consultant if she had a 2XL. She did, and she swapped out the garish leggings in the picture with a more conservative print. The rest is LuLaRoe history.

I drank the LuLaRoe kool-aid, and I liked it!

But where the heck was the Strive with Janelle booth?

It seemed we walked forever. I was getting thirsty. I was getting tired of being accosted by vendors hawking massages, or perfumes, or offering free samples of beauty products. One guy totally insulted us by offering free candy if we signed up to win a free eye-brow shaping session.

Like, do we look like we need free candy? I thought this was a woman empowerment convention, and that vendor's attitude (and his snarky look when we politely declined his offer) was very insulting. Even the guy hawking Ovarian Cancer Awareness had an attitude. It was like we were stuck in an inside Shop and Swap Market circa 1979.

And then we turned a corner, and there it was. The Strive With Janelle booth. Right next to a Tattoo booth. Right across from a guy selling doors (Doors? Yes, DOORS).

And Janelle was no where to be seen.

What the hell? I saw Logan, and his girlfriend Michelle, with a lady who was apparently one of the Strive coaches. There were maybe 2 or 3 people looking over some stuff. But where was Janelle?

We tried to look as inconspicuous as possible, but we caught the attention of the door salesman. "Can I interest you in a new door?" he asked. "No thank you. I don't need a new door, but if I ever do, I'll remember you and your business." At least he tried and didn't give us a snarky look like that other guy did.

Damn. Where was Janelle?

Then it happened. BFF whispered "Don't look. Behind you, she's walking our way." That was my clue to look straight ahead, and then I saw Janelle, walking briskly away. Bless her heart...

We figured she would come back the same way she left, but she didn't. We then noticed she was back at the booth. I finally threw caution to the wind, and snapped a picture of her. Immediately after I took this picture, Jangle sat down, and did not get up again.


BFF and I were feeling the need not to look like stalkers (ha!!) so we walked around the Expo again, leaving Jangle to finish munching whatever she was munching. We saw a Learn how to Sew class, a Learn how to Make Jewelry class. We even saw a Cooking demonstration, and a cocktail making demo. I did enjoy the Penske Group and the beautiful Aston-Martin car they had on display. Now THAT'S empowerment!

The key-note speakers on Saturday were Carson Kressley and Bo Derek, I think. Thanks but no thanks. The last Woman's Convention I attended was all seminars and the keynote speakers were Elizabeth Dole and Cindi McCain who happened to drag hubby Senator John McCain along with her. That was sometime in the 1990's I think. What a difference two decades can make.

It was getting late in the afternoon, and BFF had a dinner commitment in a couple of hours, so we made one last run on the Strive booth. Jangle was still sitting down. No customers were at the booth.

To my BFF's chagrin, I marched over to the Strive booth, proudly holding my LuLaRoe bag containing my Carly and leggings, and my half drunken $4 bottle of water. I looked over the t-shirts (nope, not interested because I now owned a LULAROE Carly t-shirt dress!, HA!!) the Strive with Janelle water bottles (nope, I already spent $4 and I really didn't want or need a Strive one).

I noticed a woman I believed to be a Strive coach coming in for the kill. And then I saw it, the Strive Pedometer. Just what I need. "How much is the pedometer..." I asked sweetly, ignoring the big sign on the counter with the prices. "Only $10..." she replied.

As I pulled out bills from my purse, the unthinkable happened. Logan walked up and started talking to me! He mentioned how a lady bought one earlier that morning and she came back to show him she had put on 9000 steps just walking from booth to booth. Michelle then appeared and showed me how she likes to attach it to her sneaker shoelaces. The coach finished up by showing me how to reset it to zero.

Not once did I see Janelle rise up from her chair.

I'm just going to say this. Logan was the friendliest person I met that day besides the LLR lady. He has a killer smile and a great personality. Michelle was also very friendly. They make a fantastic couple. I actually enjoyed talking to them both, but the only downside was they didn't clinch the deal with telling me about the Strive with Janelle program.

By this point, BFF had totally abandoned me, so I decided, what the hell. I walked over to where Janelle was sitting and starting looking at a big card talking about Strive. Nope, not one word from Janelle. Michelle came over and gave me a Strive with Janelle ink pen. Still no response from Janelle.

I then picked up a Strive with Janelle business card (that listed Janelle as the President of the company) and at that point, Janelle made eye contact with me and smiled as I said hello.

Now mind you, I just bought a pedometer, I looked over her Strive material, I even got a damn ink pen. AND I was holding a LuLaRoe bag that her sister wife was involved in. Lots of opportunity to start up a conversation that could possibly lead up to a sale, don't you think?

All I got was a smile and hello. I walked away thinking, jeez, was she there to hustle her Strive program or to sit there on her duff and pass up a prime opportunity to get my $90 for a year's membership?

Yep Janelle. That graying old black lady with the LuLaRoe bag who bought a pedometer was Cynical Jinx. Glad to finally meet you in person.

Here's a picture of my take aways for the day!