Friday, October 3, 2014

UPDATED!!! Another Off Topic Friday for October 3, 2014: Psst...Where's Kody and Robyn?




Where the heck are Kody and Robyn? I'm getting worried. Did they vacation in West Africa and are now quarantined for six months in Europe? Did the Federal Judge who sentenced Teresa and Juicy Joe to prison time previously sentence Kody and Robyn to house arrest because of their mishandling of MSWC??

Did Robyn disappear in that black hole known as Pinterest and Kody is looking for her?

Cynical's Conspiracy Theories... (or, wouldn't it be kewl if this was REALLY what was happening with Kody and Robyn! I'd watch!)

Theory #1: Kody is actively courting his 5th while Robyn is stuck at home pregnant with Sol #2.



Theory #2: Kody wants a divorce from Meri and her sisterwives so he can marry Bruce Jenner once they are both free.


Theory #3: A combination of theories #1 and #2. Once Bruce's divorce is final, Kody will make him his wife #5. Which is cool with Meri, but not so cool with Robyn who's had to keep a low profile since she's pregnant and realizes she is no match for Bruce. Oh, and Bruce will live with Meri.




I feel so much better now that's off my mind!

The last time we saw Meri she was vacationing with a galpal at the Happiest Place on Earth (and it's not the Brown's gated cul-de-sac, trust me). Just before getting on a cruise ship bound for the Pacific Ocean, of all places.



Well, it looks like Kody didn't go on the cruise after all...(see conspiracy theory #3 above). At least Meri seemed to be making new friends while cruising...







Not only is Meri back on terra firma now, she's got some 'splaining to do with her other best bud...the Lady in Red!



Call me Cynical (Ms Jinx if you're nasty)  but I still think Kody is definitely courting his 5th!

Just file this next tweet from Mykelti under tab "What the Heck?"


Let's just hope their mother Christine kicked Kody you know where, then shoved him out of her McMansion while speed dialing her attorney on her cell. But they most likely got a piece of furniture for their apartment living room after receiving a TLC check that was "lost in the mail."

Janelle, Janelle, Janelle. You know, the more this lady tweets, the better we begin to see she's not the brightest bulb on the Christmas tree...

For example, either she didn't fully read this tweet from SciencePorn, or she just didn't understand it's implications. After all, aren't the Browns the biggest consumer of Apple products this side of the Pacific Ocean?

I bet all the PCs at SciencePorn use Unix operating system. Tsk, tsk...pitting an entrepreneur against an academic and calling foul because the academic didn't acquire the same level of fame as the entrepreneur. Can we say comparing apples with oranges?


And then she tweeted how her hubby Kody doesn't treat his women like beasts of burden...She must have been listening to the Stones because I think Beast of Burden was one of their greatest songs.

But I digress...







Call me (and a lot of other people in my living room) crazy, but I've never seen Kody carry anything heavier than Sol. Maybe Janelle's feeling upset because some women think of her (and her sister wives) as brood mares. Truth hurts sometimes...

Now here's a Janelle tweet that shows just how deep a thinker she really is...

I think Los Angeles being located next to Pacific Ocean may have something to do with that phenomenon, Janelle.

Oh, and look everybody! Janelle's cooking...well canning. Isn't that almost cooking?



Finally a tweet from Christine, featuring Truely, of course...




On the Darger Family Facebook page, looks like Alina (the legal one and cousin to her sister wives, the identical twins) had some followup surgery on her shoulder. Is it me or does Alina seem to be very very happy in this snapshot...


Post by The Darger Family.


Although the link is wonky, this Dargerite (unable to determine exactly who from the family wrote the comment) doesn't like the new-fangled cuisines  the 21st century is offering. This coming from the state that raised Jello salad and tuna casseroles to a culinary art form...whatever, and pass me that sriracha sauce, please...


Post by The Darger Family.


Looks like the Brady Bunch on the official TLC fanpage are saving the best for when the season starts. But I just love Brady's crazy eyes in this photo!


Post by My Five Wives.




UPDATE UPDATE UPDATE UPDATE UPDATE

10/4/14

Seems now that Meri is back home from the high seas, she's cleaning out some old tweets...

For instance, this one. Makes you wonder why she's missing Sol when he lives just next door with his Mama Dearest Robyn...or has Robyn flown the hen McMansions?



And this one from Mariah...something is rotten in the cul-de-sac...




That's all for now. New updates as they occur!!

Bruce Jenner Photo credit: nydailynews.com Mike McGregor
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Friday, September 26, 2014

Off Topic Friday: Has Someone Been Lurking in My Living Room? September 26, 2014



Ms "Just Your Average TV Star" pondering her future and why peeps are rude
Is it just me or does it seem somebody's been lurking my living room?

Some folks have commented how a certain Brown collegian, who aspires to be a medical doctor when she grows up, never tweets about her studies. Her sisters by different mothers have, but this one Brown child has preferred to tweet about how her roommates love to keep their apartment hot and how people are rude.


She even tweeted about wearing her hoodie. But nothing about her classes.

Until now...

Suddenly we get tweets reminding us of her major. She even gets philosophical about the meaning of life. Weird isn't it? Especially when she was the topic of conversation in my living room 2 days before. Was this simply a case of coincidence? I don't think so.

But it could be damage control.

So here are the tweets. I'll let you be the judge...









Pretty heavy stuff, right? And in case you don't have the energy to click on the link to see the last 12 words of her tweet...Here's the entire tweet:

"watching curious case of Benjamin button at 11 when I have class tomorrow because it's so damn good & I got a decent amount of sleep last night so I'm not tired"

Could it be Miss "Just Your Average TV Star" has decided to show the world...well, her twitter followers at least, she has turned over a new leaf and that she is human, after all?

I wouldn't be surprised if she tweets "When I'm cut, do I not bleed?" or something like that in the near future.


On to the TV Star's mother, who appears to still be in travel mode. Last weekend it was Utah. This weekend, it's a LIV cruise...



Meri even took time out to do some MSWC Customer Care (or Repair to be more accurate). Makes me wonder where is Robyn and what is she doing?


Just file this next tweet under Somehow This Doesn't Surprise Me...

Either Meri's cooking is way off or Kody needs to get his olfactory nerves checked. I wonder if it taste like Frog Legs to him?

And then there's this photo Meri took:

Maybe it's been a while since Meri actually saw a man "working". Many moons ago, I worked part-time in a hobby retail store. Now, there was always one thing the manager had to make sure there were plenty of: Shopping Carts. Before the store opened, the store manager would get into his car and search for our stores distinctive shopping carts, bringing them home. We jokingly called it the "cart corral" because the guy would drive up and down a major road and the parking lot with at least 10 carts linked together. So I don't find this picture out of the ordinary at all.


Seems Janelle is still caught up in tweeting about her weight loss journey. She's also missing her boys. I have two words to help her: Bug Spray


Yeah, so where does the butter and coconut oil fit into this new goal? Is coconut oil a vegetable?



Don't forget your coffee!! And the butter!

On the Darger Facebook, a rather cryptic message is leaving fans hoping nothing bad has happened...


Post by The Darger Family.



And on the My Five Wives Facebook, the official announcement of the start date for their second season was made...


Post by My Five Wives.



Meanwhile, on the Brady Williams Family Facebook, there's a picture of Brady in a kitchen looking "sporty"???


Post by Brady and Wives.


Oh, and before I forget...There's this short and to the point posting on Honey Baby Hoo Ha's official TLC Facebook fanpage...

Post by Here Comes Honey Boo Boo.


From what I've read, this is a TLC/Producers ploy to increase lagging ratings. Mama June was also looking for bigger digs, too. Hey, that sounds just like Teresa Giudice, who's now claiming Bravo/Producers FORCED her to carry a pricey ($8K) handbag while being filmed looking for a cheaper place to live. I wonder if Mama June will be on the next Celebrity Apprentice?


That's all for now! More updates as they occur!

PS...I'm still working on the 2014 Plyggie Awards Results!!

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Monday, September 22, 2014

I Scour the Internet: The Browns at College Edition for September 23, 2014


Collegians Aspyn, Maddie, Mykelti and Mariah


Who would've thunk it?

These four, young, Brown sisters from different mothers (and one doofus father) are all college students!!

 Aspyn and Mariah are now sophomores, while Maddie and Mykelti are freshman this semester!




Unfortunately, it appears Bonus Mom Meri didn't get to UNLV. No doubt her bouts of the "vapors" and playing the role of  "groupie" for that fabulous Utah band VanLadyLove did not leave much time for college. Oh well...UNLVs lost and the world of at risk youth's gain is one way to look at this.

Meri's been way too busy to be a college girl...she's working hard at her role as the Jet-Setting Sister Wife and VLL supporter at the first Utah Music Awards...


Perhaps she's decided her career path should be in the entertainment industry...looks like she's scoping out a new band to stalk...i mean to follow...
But the VLL accolades keep spilling from her nimble fingers to her twitter followers...



Good grief, Meri. How much are these guys paying you?


Like a true globetrotter, Meri takes a picture of the busy airport tarmac.No more putting mileage on her car for her weekly Utah trips..Next time she'll be leasing a private plane instead of flying commercial!
But she still has time for one more VLL tweet...



Thus, we have the reasons why Meri is not at UNLV this semester...


The Brown's "Just Your Average TV Star" is still trying to find her Twitter voice. I suppose she saves all her mature stuff for her true friends on instagram...

Good question Mariah. Your "audience" has been wondering the same about you since last semester...

I hate to break this to you, but they even let nurses "fix" cuts nowadays. Now, if you had reattached a finger or limb, that would have been noteworthy!



Oh yes, Miss Sunshine is shining through again...
Amazing how she can go from one extreme to the other in a matter of minutes, isn't it?
First she's waking up, now she's complaining about the lack of sleep. Which is it?
I suppose this mention of the Boston hoodie means something significant...
Ahhhh...she's looking up med schools. Now, I wonder what city they are located in...could it be....BOSTON?????
Let's hope you have better luck than your mother Meri and bonus mom Janelle...
Uncomfortable isn't the word...I think scared to death is more accurate.

Looks like you got more than coffee...so what sweet was in the wrapper?


And then there's Freshman Maddie. Now let's be real, Maddie can have her entitled moments too. But there is something fresh and endearing about her that you can't stay upset with her for long...Follow the next three tweets where you can't help relating to what she's experiencing...




Hey Maddie! Don't despair! Econ is hard!!!


But all is well! Maddie pledged a sorority and the world is rosy again. Hey, maybe one of her Greek sisters is an Econ major...

This is sweet...(wipes tear from eye)
No doubt the color influence comes from being around Bonus Mom Christine all those years.



Hmmm....for some reason Mykelti's tweets tend to be on the dark and brooding side, if you know what I mean. For a girl who believed her father's malarkey about kissing and passing hormones, you'd think she'd be more...pious, know what I mean?


Did this come from a romance novel?
All righty then.

At least she eats healthy...My BFF calls oatmeal for dinner her "Harvest Grain Festivale." I don't eat dinner at her house much...
And yet another Brown going Greek!




So does this mean she's working at the library or doing homework there? At any rate, she's miles ahead of her mom and dad in the work and school departments.


Meri may be having dizzy spells, but Aspyn seems to have a more serious problem...

A girl has to know her limitations...

Can you tell this is Aspyn's second year in a sorority?
Hmmm....I wonder what Aspyn is saying. It's all Greek to me...
Aspyn are you suffering from multiple rush crushes?



And this just in...

Mykelti got into the sorority she wanted!





Well that's all the tweets from the college teens for now. And remember, I Scour the Internet (Twitter) So YOU Don't Have to!





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