TLC Sister Wives - Blogs Robyn Brown: Open Letter to a Monogamous Beautician

Robyn with her sister Taralyce               (TLC)

Funny, just a couple of days ago, a friend asked me what I thought about Janelle's blog...I pooh-poohed her, saying that it was the ONE thing the Browns did right - by only having Janelle with a blog writing about topics that most women could relate to and understand.

Then it happened. TLC posted a blog from of all people Robyn, who is clueless, CLUELESS on what concerns women may have in their daily life. In fact, just to show how self-centered she still is (after almost 3 years of marriage) her first blog entry focused on Robyn and how a beautician mistreated her.

Remember Robyn's rant about Hunter not so long ago? Well, now she has turned her wrath on an unknown beautician. I imagine Christine and the older Brown children are breathing a sigh of relief that Robyn has set her sights on someone OUTSIDE of the family cul-de-sac this time.

I find her story to be unbelievable. This is how she described what happened:

"I had this experience with a beautician that really threw me off and set me back. I sat down in her chair to get my hair done and immediately I could tell she was bothered. Her face was hard and after a few moments of awkward small talk she looked me straight in the eye and said, 'You must be crazy and stupid to ever think being married to a man with more than one wife was a smart choice.' "

Trust me, if I thought a beautician was that upset about my sitting in her chair, I would get my fat behind up off that chair and ask for another stylist. Or complain to the manager. Or look at my watch and say "Oops, I've got to go. Thanks, I'll leave your tip with the cashier." I would not just sit there and allow a woman with a scowl on her face (and a pair of deadly weapon scissors in her hand) anywhere near the juggler veins in my throat, let alone the hairs on my head.

Nope, that was pure fantasy on Ms Sullivan's part.

In a way, her Letter to a Monogamous Beautician was so indicative of what makes Robyn tick.

When Robyn says "Please allow me to enlighten you" she's actually saying How DARE you talk to me that way. I am better than you, and don't you ever, EVER forget it !

And can Robyn be so simpleminded to think that her 'belief system', which apparently allows single women to fantasize about married men as potential husbands, would sit well with the married women in the world? No wonder her 'belief system' doesn't actively proselytize. What married woman would want to join a 'belief system' where every "belief system' get together becomes a supermarket where single women can shop for a husband. Based, of course, on that man's track record with his current wife (or wives), his ability to parent, and surprise surprise, his wealth. Wealth that the original wife worked hard to obtain and now some single female wants to share. Let's be real, forget about how the man treats his wives or his ability to parent, it boils down to this: Easy money, and with Kody Brown, 15 minutes of fame on the side.

So this is how I picture Robyn meeting Kody that first time. While Robyn was husband shopping, a check out girl announced "Clean up on aisle 3", Robyn hurried over and saw Kody standing there with camera crew in tow.

Robyn may not be the brightest bulb on the Christmas tree, but she's not a total idiot. The rest is history.

When Robyn says "I KNEW my husband was going to be a good husband and father before I even started to consider marrying him..." I laughed out loud. Robyn honey, like you said in that book you co-wrote, you saw the convertibles, you were offered a free wedding and honeymoon. Woman, you saw DOLLAR SIGNS and a TV SHOW - that's what motivated you to get married again.

Short of Kody falling off of Mount Everest, this was a done deal. And to support this, you even said of your first marriage you were married to the son of a very prominent polygamist family. Well, now you are married to a polygamist man on a reality show on national TV. So please, spare me the "I am lucky and blessed" simplistic view of your 'belief system'. You married up, and most likely you will be onto your next polygamist hubby once the Sister Wives train pulls into the depot for the last time and the McMansions go on the auction block.

You can read the entire article here: Robyn Brown: Open Letter to a Monogamous Beautician

Review: S05Ep05 Mourning the Loss and S05Ep06 Confronting Failure

All right, let's just get the Drake situation out in the open.


What is obvious to me is that Kody took this sad event as an opportunity, once again, to feed his insatiable need to be THE CENTER of attention by showcasing his return to Utah for the first time. 

Come on, digging the grave while the dog is walking around, wagging his tail?



And that oh so dramatic 'breakdown' ?

When Kody says "This is so depressing" all I can do is scream at my poor TV, 

Puuuulllleeeezzzze!!!!!!!

Kody wasn't suffering  from the emotion of digging a grave - he was suffering from the effort of doing W.O.R.K. And don't be fooled when Kody 'cries' about not being able to say goodbye to his home in Lehi. HE STILL OWNS THE HOUSE IN LEHI... and left Lehi because he always wanted to live in Las Vegas. Kody has got to be the WORST actor on the face of this planet.

Let's just hope Meri and Kody weren't feeding poor Drake that green kool-aid.

'Nuff of that, let's talk about physical fitness!

Poor Trainer Bill. He has officially left the building and Trainer Sean has stepped in as his replacement.  Janelle has finally admitted to herself that she's an emotional and stress eater, and how a 10 pound weight loss in 6 months just doesn't cut it. She has also come to the realization that maybe it was better to exercise on her own rather than with her sister wives. With a set goal of losing 100 pounds (and her trusty green kool-aid to keep her hydrated), she now exercises in the early morning, when she knows her sister wives are still sleeping.

Ah the joys of plural marriage. It just keeps getting better and better!

So what's happening on those McMansions? Kody and his Kodettes go to Mona the real estate lady's office to finalize those options, like which cheap looking granite (out of only THREE cheap looking choices) for the counter tops, and that Meri still hasn't made all her decisions, but is still over budget on just her first page of options.

It's obvious Meri may be mourning the loss of her ever loving mind! Finally, FINALLY, the options are all worked out, but as they leave the office, Kody says something that's really puzzling. He said that Mona the real estate lady reminded him that they still need to maintain the little good credit they have, and continue to clean up their crappy credit  " as [they] move forward for the final purchase."

Say WHUT???? Did Kody just say move forward for the FINAL PURCHASE? I thought those McMansions were a done deal! So maybe, Christine wasn't lying after all, and her lips were indeed loose when she said they didn't get the houses?

Despite all of this ominous foreshadowing, we are still shown the ground breaking of the McMansions...well, Christine's McMansion. They even celebrated  with some red colored bubbly drink. But back on the couch, Kody explained that " We have a bunch of work to do, from the time that we make a contract to purchase the homes til where we are actually purchasing them."  When Meri tried to clarify by saying "...so really we could go through this whole process of looking at the homes and picking everything out and getting so excited and something could happen and we could not be ..."  Kody didn't let her finish, saying instead  "...we could lose it altogether! This is not a guarantee!"

Holy Toledo! Do the producers think this Did They or Didn't They tactic is going to sit well with the viewers? Is there a reason why the producers think it's necessary, at this late date, to still string the audience along for the ride? Earth to Figure 8: We want to see the Browns move in those McMansions they can't afford! WE WANT IT!!

Seriously, I think we (the audience) are being set up for the return of the Browns to their Lehi home. But here's a suggestion...how about the Browns relocating to four double wides in the Nevada desert first? Are you listening, Figure 8?

While the Browns confront the possibility of their McMansions going busterino, Robyn has her own problems. Yes, I am talking about that sorry launch of My Sister Wife's Closet!

But business before pleasure. Yes, I'm talking about Mykelti's dream of being a fashion designer. Was it just me or did Mykelti not look too excited about meeting a real fashion designer? I don't know, when I was Mykelti's age I wanted to be a designer too. I had notebooks upon notebooks of designs for dresses and shoes and hairstyles. But I'll tell you one thing, if I met a real life designer (Mary Quant was my idol) I would at least act somewhat excited about it. Maybe the fact that Kody took over the segment had something to do with it. It just didn't feel - right.

Frankly, there was no need to have Kody present, period. Kody, in his personality, chooses - no he DEMANDS to be the center of attention, even if it's a 5 minute segment about his teen daughter's aspirations to be a fashion designer. Note to Figure 8: This could have been a 30 minute show about Mykelti working with this avant-garde fashion designer. That would have been interesting. Kody, in his personality, trying hard not to ogle a fashion model getting into a garment was not interesting. It was weird.

At least Mykelti's mom Christine had something to cheer about. In confronting her failure, she finally succeeded in passing her real estate exam. So even though Kody was not very supportive of her, it was wonderful to see her smile while saying " I passed!" to her family. Equally delicious was her dig at Robyn, Meri and Kody when she mentioned how wonderful it will feel when she brings home her first commission check that she will use to pay off a family debt (most likely either Robyn's old Victoria Secret bill or Meri's cost overruns on her McMansion options).

And now, for what you have been waiting so patiently to read - the launch of My Sister Wife's Closet!

This little trinket will set your credit card back about $300.00 !! It's embarrassing to hear Kody's half brain explanation for the outrageous pricing. "In my head..." he begins, "our pieces I wanted to be somewhat iconic in the sense that they're different, they're unique to us, and they're not cheap." In other words, hold onto your wallets, Kody's gonna RIP YOU OFF!

It's so funny to read on the Facebook pages how some fans actually think the jewelry is not overpriced. In fact, one fan said she was glad the prices were high because you get what you pay for.

Honey, I have another saying for you, it's "A fool and his money are soon  parted."

Meri and Kody watching the visitor numbers going up up up!

Janelle not looking very optimistic: 300 visitors but no orders !

Kody's reaction to a fan's tweet about how expensive the jewelry is
 

Kody pondering how 28 sales will pay the mortgage for 4 McMansions

MSWC is overpriced junk. There, I said it. If Kody thinks this vanity venture of Robyn's is going to help finance those 4 overpriced McMansions, he is seriously deluded. Even Meri appears to be drinking the same Kody delusion cocktail when she arrogantly says " This is not discount jewelry." Hey Meri, maybe you should research how a discount jewelry business works and makes a profit before snubbing your nose at them.

And Robyn, perhaps taking some classes on running a business would help you and your little vanity venture. As it is, having your website go down every time the show mentions MSWC is rotten for sales. And don't turn to your hubby Kody for advice: He was a failure in  business - which is not surprising since he thinks price gouging makes good business sense. Next time instead of spending money for an expensive computer and gun for Kody, maybe invest in a better server for your website that can handle the traffic !!

Yep, the writing is on the wall for MSWC!!

Big Love and Sister Wives: A Brief Comparison Between Matriarchs

Here's a brief comparison of the grandmothers of Big Love and Sister Wives.

Yes, I know Lois and Adaleen are fictional characters, but they do present some common characteristics with  Genielle; mainly hospitality and love of family. Well, perhaps Lois not so much on the hospitality.

Anyway, one thing for sure, they certainly love their children, although I don't think Adaleen nor Lois would be as kind as Genielle if their son tried to eat half of her breakfast.

Genielle Brown	Lois Henrickson	Adaleen Grant
First wife of Winn Brown, mother of Kody Brown. Has 2 other sister wives.	Second* wife of Frank Harlow, mother of Bill Henrickson. Had 5 other sister wives (one deceased).	Sixth wife of Juniper Creek’s prophet Roman Grant, mother of Nicolette and Alby Grant. Had 13 other sister wives.
According to Kody, his mother would “fall on her sword for me.”	Sliced off the right arm of Hollis Greene with a large serrated knife when he dared to put a hand on her son Bill.	Conspired to have son Alby murdered in a rest stop men’s room. (Tap...Tap...Tap)
Was LDS, and converted to fundamentalism when Kody was in his teens. Was later excommunicated from the LDS church while Kody was on his LDS mission. Her sister wife Sheryl is Kody’s wife Janelle’s mother.	Lois’ father Orville Henrickson was prophet of Juniper Creek who died under mysterious circumstances. He was succeeded by his accountant, Roman Grant.	Adaleen has a complicated family tree. As she explains:“I'm 32 out of 56 children. And when I married Roman, I became my own step grandma as my father married Roman's daughter Faylene.   When I had Alby, he became my great uncle and I became his great great grandmother. Which of course makes me my own grandmother." Not to mention she also married her daughter’s ex-husband J.J.
Had problems with jealousy when Sheryl joined the family. As she puts it “I took care of kids and Sheryl took care of Winn.” Later, she got to know Sheryl better, and now considers her one of her very best friends.	Was notorious for her ill treatment of her sister wives. Of the concussions her sister wives suffered at her hands, she explained  "The Principle brings up our jealousies for the purposes of healing."	When Adaleen was asked how she could stand a particularly loathsome sister wife, she replied “I love her, and we are all equals. But last night I did dream I was trying to push her out the car  while driving along at a pretty quick clip.”