Tuesday, December 30, 2014

I Scour The Internet: The Happy New Year Edition for December 30, 2014 UPDATED!!!

Yes, the new season of Sister Wives begins Sunday, January 4th, 2015!


Where has the year 2014 gone? Why, it seems like yesterday we were watching the Brown Krew Kavorting with venture capitalists who proved to be less than anxious to give up their hard-earned cash, while heading on down the highway to Route 66 and meeting those Christian Polygamists in Missouri who know other polygamists that believe in sharing their marital bed, if you know what I mean.



And who can forget the sight of Kody getting Brown goo all over his favorite pair of shoes when SOMEONE failed to properly close the black water valve on the RV?

Or that cliff-hanging last scene of Robyn running frantically to answer her ringing phone. I mean, come on. As if Robyn even KNOWS how to run!!??!! And who the heck would be calling her so late? Her Ob/Gyn???

I seriously doubt that.

Ah, those were certainly the days. We can only hope that this new Winter Season of Sister Wives can be just as much fun. Well, actually I was hoping for more fun but we have to go with what we have, right?

So let me repeat this....
The new season of Sister Wives begins on Sunday, January 4th, 2015.

Be there or be square.

And what have the Browns and their other polygamist friends been up to since we last talked?

Well, not much, I'm afraid...

Of course we have this obligatory reminder of the start of the new season, being retweeted by Kody and his Kodettes.

But couldn't TLC have used a more recent picture of Kody and Krew? I mean, just look at it. Meri and Christine are both wearing outfits they wore about a million times on the show at least 3 seasons ago. And Janelle looks like she's still holding onto some of those gosh awful blouses she supposedly did away with when she moved into her McMansion.

And Robyn...Holy Toledo, what the H.E. double hockey sticks was she thinking when she pulled that outfit together?? Let's just say her outfit has not improved with age!


Let's hope for the announcement of the Summer season (if there is one) TLC springs for some new photos. Please????


Okay, so it's Christmas time right? Obviously a major tradition for the Browns is to travel to Disneyland. This time it was Meri and her acorn that didn't fall far from the tree.




I'm beginning to wonder what Kody and Krew would do if Disneyland were to close down. But we all know that won't happen - not with what those people must spend each year for the privilege of standing in long lines while posing as Reality TV Stars.

For some odd reason, Meri continues to tweet these rather odd memes. Is this wishful thinking on her part?

I'd rather not watch Meri twirl her way on the dance floor. Something tells me it just wouldn't be...modest. And her twirling could stop the Earth's rotation with disastrous results for mankind.


And on the subject of wishful thinking, I'm sure Mariah will make Meri and Kody proud when she finally ties the celestial knot. Let's just hope Karma makes her a 2nd wife and she's treated the same way her mother treated Janelle when she joined the family as a 2nd!



On the subject of Janelle, she posted a picture of her three eldest children.. Funny how on the Sister Wives Official FB page, the fans there didn't recognize Maddie. I mean, really, did they really not see the difference? Hello in there! Janelle has bleached blonde hair!!!


Funny but Janelle was the only Brown Sister Wife to actually wish her fans Happy Holidays! Sorry Meri but sending a picture of a Disneyland street decoration just doesn't compare, know what I mean?

And here's Janelle explaining why Meri and Mariah went to Disneyland. It's a Brown family tradition, don't you know!

Fans, did you see where Sister Wives is back with a two hour premiere on January 4th?

LIVE TWEET PARTY Y'ALL!!!!




Of course, the Brown's friends in polygamy the Dargers also showed their fans how they celebrated the holidays.


Post by The Darger Family.


And just check out the TOTALLY EXCITED FACES on these young Darger faces. Makes me wonder if Papa Joe was standing on the side hissing "You Will Have Fun, DAMN IT!!"

Post by The Darger Family.


At least the Williams Family is a little more laid back...Face it, you have to be with 24 kids and five wives (with one wife preggers). But at least they remembered to thank all their fans for watching their show...unlike another polygamist family who shall be unnamed...


Post by Brady and Wives.


Post by Brady and Wives.


Finally, we have a picture of a very pregnant Nonie showing off her latest baby bump.

Post by Brady and Wives.


UPDATE UPDATE UPDATE UPDATE UPDATE UPDATE UPDATE UPDATE


This just in...

Here's a video featuring Mykelti Brown that was shared in my other living room on Facebook.

All I can say is...watch this as a cautionary tale of what happens when Kody Brown is in charge of the religious upbringing of children. Just like him, it gets all screwed up!






No wonder Christine was worried about this poor child. I'd be worried too.

This poor child is proof that Kody Brown is worthless as the religious leader of his family. I can't believe this child actually said that if she fell in love with a married man she would approach the man's wife to become her sister wife...

Mykelti honey, here's some advice from a monogamist. You best leave the married man's wife alone because in most cases she will attempt to rearrange your features in ways that the end results will not be flattering and will hurt like hell for a very long time.

Stay AWAY from married men. ... PERIOD!

She needs to understand this is real life and not some damn fairy tale where a woman can pick off married men like apples at the supermarket.

She's in for a very rude awakening, that's for sure!


And in case you missed the earlier showing, Escaping Polygamy will replay New Year's Day!



Post by Kollene Snow.




That's all for now, and remember, I Scoured the Internet so YOU didn't have to waste your time on this trivial stuff, right? And stay tuned for Sunday's Live Tweet Party Right Here!


H A P P Y   N E W   Y E A R !!!!
 



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Wednesday, December 24, 2014

Happy Holidays Everyone!


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Sunday, December 21, 2014

Live Tweet Party: Season Finales Night for December 21, 2014




My living room is now open early for the 90 Day Fiancé and My Five Wives Season Finales!!



Are you ready? Come on in, view the tweets and join the discussion. All in the comfort of My Living Room! (Don't forget Sister Wives new season starts Sunday, January 4, 2015!)

And you don't even need to dress up, much.

So kick off yer shoes, get comfy and sharpen up yer snark. There's still room on the couch!

Let the snarking begin!!


Tweets for My Five Wives
























Tweets for 90 Day Fiancé



Will these couples join Amy and Danny, Mo and Dani by walking down the aisle?










Don't forget the new season of Sister Wives premieres on January 4, 2015!

For selected tweets from Kody Brown and his Sister Wives, click here for the lastest edition of I Scour The Internet.


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Friday, December 19, 2014

I Scour the Internet Five Days til Christmas Fifteen Days til Sister Wives Premiere Edition for December 20 2014


Have I mentioned yet that Sister Wives "Winter" Season premieres on January 4th, 2014? AND it's a whole TWO (that's 2) HOURS LONG! I don't know about you, but I am simply tickled a lighter shade of cappuccino.

But you know, I've been saying this since My Five Wives started their second season.

You just can't get good snark out of  Brady Williams and Wives. Every time I try to watch My Five Wives I wind up falling into a deep sleep. And I have a feeling I'm not alone!



So to say I am eagerly anticipating the new season of Sister Wives is an understatement.

I want the snark...I need the snark...I will not be denied the snark any longer!

I feel much better now.

Now what's been happening this week with those Kwirky Klowns consisting of Kody and his Kodettes©. Let's check out their twitter tweets, shall we?

Looks like Robyn is into the giving part of the season. How nice it is seeing an adult Brown actually thinking about people outside of the family cul-de-sac.


Of course, Meri must keep up the Brown tradition of doing as little work as humanly possible. Remember when she tweeted about the Spot in Phoenix?
What transpired next I'm now calling the Battle of the Mean Girls.

Mean Girl Cynical Jinx calls out Mean Girl Meri Brown on Twitter, and Mean Girl Meri Brown tries to laugh it off and tells Mean Girl Cynical Jinx to just "Google It, B...." (My interpretation, of course)

Eventually Mean Girl Meri Brown relented and tweeted at the last possible moment the actual address of The Spot. Oh looky. It's not in Phoenix, it's in GILBERT Az about 25 miles to the east. Oh well...Looks like Mean Girl Cynical Jinx was right after all!

You better sit down for this one. Kody decided to help out a friend by tweeting his followers for help, and I called him out on it!



Folks, Hell has frozen over. Kody actually does reply. I had to sit down and fan myself cuz I thought for sure I was going to faint when I saw his response...


Kody's tweet may actually clear up a question a lot of people have had since the Browns moved to Sin City. Mainly, are they still members of the AUB. Considering Mr Browniac's response, it kinda looks that way, doesn't it? [And did he just "out" his friend Shane at the same time? Oopsies!]

On the topic of "noble gestures" a FB user kindly posted a link to youtu be's policies and guidelines concerning contests on December 16th directly on the piano store's FB account.

Oh oh...somebody's got some 'splaining to do.

Looks like the piano store may have (OK,drop the may have and call it like it is) violated some youtu.be contest policies...specifically that the contestants need to be 18 years old or older, and that the contest should be a game of skill with the winner determined by "a set of clear judging criteria."

The BIGGEST problem was the store's criteria that "The video with the most views WINS!!" Oopsies #2. According to  youtu be's policy that is/was a big no-no. Verbatim, the policy states "You may not utilize channel functions, such as video likes or view counts, to conduct your contest."

Oh well, I guess youtu.be has those policies in place to keep contests fair and to avoid the shenanigans "reality stars" like  Kody and his Kodettes© tried to pull on twitter by marshaling their combined 386 thousand followers to help their friend in his "noble gesture" to donate that piano if he won. Too bad Shane wasn't friends with Anderson Cooper who has 5.43 million followers or Oprah Winfrey with her 26.1 million followers. He might have actually had a shot at winning that piano!


The commercial for the new Sister Wives season (you know, the "Winter" season that begins on January 4th 2015) started rumors that Kody not only was bringing another female into the house, but that the female was in the form of wife #5.

I'm happy to report we have solved that rumor and can categorically tell you the female moving in is a real bitch!


Then again, we could be wrong...stay tuned! [And let's hope those aren't actual NAILS pounded into the wall to hang those stockings]

You have to love Janelle. First she tweets about how hard it is to find a family friendly TV show like TLC's The Secret Santa to watch with her kids....[plug plug plug that TLC special!]



and of course, her reminder tweet to her followers of the new season...


But then in the next tweet, she retweets not only another cable network, but possibly the most violent, gory TV series out there...




Hey, is that Robyn's picture on the side of that truck?


All righty then...

Back in Darger Land...Here's Papa Joe trying to look FIERCE...and succeeding in looking like a fierce serial killer on the run!



Post by The Darger Family.


Papa Joe even threw his hat into the news pundit arena by commenting about those North Korean hackers bringing Sony to its knees this month. What's unusual about this posting is how he has ignored the Brady Williams Clan whose TV show is still being shown on TLC.


Post by The Darger Family.


And speaking of  Brady Williams, he shared an update on his grandson BabyHuck...


Post by Brady and Wives.




Well that's all for now. And remember. I Scour the Internet So YOU Don't Have To!

Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays, Everyone!



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Sunday, December 14, 2014

LIVE TWEET PARTY for 12/14/14 for 90DayFiance and MyFiveWives!!


My living room is now open for early 90 Day Fiancé and My Five Wives partyers!!



Are you ready? Come on in, view the tweets and join the discussion. All in the comfort of My Living Room!

And you don't even need to dress up, much.

So kick off yer shoes, get comfy and sharpen up yer snark. There's still room on the couch!

Let the snarking begin!!


Tweets for My Five Wives
























Tweets for 90 Day Fiancé













Don't forget the new season of Sister Wives premieres on January 4, 2015!

For selected tweets from Kody Brown and his Sister Wives, click here for the lastest edition of I Scour The Internet.


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Sunday, December 7, 2014

I Scour the Internet: The Sister Wives Return 1/4/15 Edition for December 7, 2014




TLC finally made it official: Sister Wives new season (called the Winter Season - how festive!) begins January 4th, 2015! I suppose it was TLC's final slap to the face of Here Comes Honey Boo Boo. Polygamy triumphs again, tra lalalala lala la la...

I'm just glad to get Sister Wives back. I hate to say this, but I will. Sister Wives makes for the best snark, ever! Job well done, Browns...

So let's check out what the Brown Krew has been up to since we last met...

Well, sounds like Meri's been sleeping single in a double bed with insomnia again, poor dear...



To make up for not majoring in Philosophy (or any other worthwhile subject) at UNLV this semester, she has taken to tweeting her own version of "Deep Thoughts by Jack Handey".

I'm calling this as I see it, so here's Meri Brown's Contradictory Thoughts...


I'm guessing Robyn didn't get this lecture when she felt Hunter didn't show her the respect she deserved after popping out King Sol. Oh, and don't forget Christine having to apologize to her for not properly welcoming her to the family.


Guess sisterwives don't count...



I love this one...kind of explains how Meri treated Janelle after she joined the family as Kody's 2nd wife.


Which also would explain why Cynical Jinx' question just disappeared AND was never answered. I suppose if CJ were Meri's close friend, Meri would have deleted and blocked her ample rear-end.


Cue the crickets...CJ is still waiting...


And then we have....



So true, Meri. So true. Hey, was this Meri's passive-aggressive answer to sweet, dear Cynical Jinx?

Mariah was in rare form last week. She's a science major, ya know...





I especially liked this response to a "fan". Well, at least she made an effort and actually REPLIED. Unlike her mother...



Down the road from Mariah, Maddie is also suffering through finals...







Back in Vegas, Mykelti is also falling victim to the scourge of finals week...





But Aspyn seems focused on more important things...







while looking extremely...



Janelle did a lot of retweeting, but did find time to make some announcements...





And to show off what a great bonus mom she is...





Can you imagine Meri hosting a cookie decorating party???

Off the subject of hosting a party, Robyn may be on Twitter hiatus but Kody did take the time to tweet this picture showing the results of Dayton's first wrestling experience. Too bad Robyn wore dark clothes.


Can you imagine Robyn and Kody dressing for the wrestling meet? Robyn got to wear the dark Centennial HS sweatshirt to keep up the speculation is she, or isn't she? Kody wore the light Centennial  sweatshirt to show off his curvy yet still manly physique. And Dayton had to ice his aching shoulder afterwards. OUCH!!

That's all for now. And remember. I Scour the Internet so YOU don't have To!!!


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