Tuesday, October 28, 2014

UPDATE !! Off Topic Tuesday: Guess Who Had A Birthday and Other Select Tweets for 10/27/14

"We're getting Here Come Honey Boo Boo's time spot!"

Boy, has the past seven days been busy!

First, the Jodi Arias  sentencing trial started, and recently finished it's 4th day of deliberation (and have already lost 2 jurors!).

Then there was that big old mess in the Honey Boo Boo house that TLC expertly cleaned up quickly - like a surgeon lancing a festering boil on the ass of humanity (I sort of made that up).

I need some penicillin, stat!




But leave it to our polygamist buds to keep us monogamist harlots from walking the streets like zombies, by entertaining us with their tweets. (I sort of made that up, too)

Ah, right...

So what's been up with the Brown Krew?

Robyn is still on lockdown, but her handlers did allow her to tweet about her favorite son, King Sol. Has it been three years already?


Of course, the rest of the Brown sister wives, along with Meri's acorn and Robyn's nanny/housekeeper Mindy, contributed to the mutual admiration festival celebrating the third birthday of Kody's latest offspring.

But I'll never understand Meri's need to retweet what should be between family members...such as this tweet from Mindy.

Of course, Meri was compelled...COMPELLED to tweet about her most wonderful offspring...probably mumbling under her breath how Mariah is much more important than former galpal's Sol...


And then of course she had to give kudos to bonus child's Hunter's recent wrestling 2nd place victory.

I wonder why Meri was hanging out at the airport? Was she picking up traveler Janelle? Or did Mariah just have to come home, again. Oh please tell me she wasn't stalking VLL!!!


No surprise here from Kody. Yeah, yeah. Sol's just a chip off the old block, right Kody? NOT...


And of course, Kody tweeted his approval of Hunter's wrestling performance...it was soooo close. I wonder if Kody practices what he preaches? Motivational fuel? Pride and depth?

And how nice to retweet Coach Wike's tweet about shoes...

Kody just had to make a female fan feel like an idiot. I think Kimberly had it right. Kody would be doing a lot of running away from his wrestling opponents nowadays!


I don't understand Mariah's tweets sometimes when it's about Sol. It just seems so...weird, especially when she has five other brothers that she has never tweeted about so...glowingly.

Of course, Aspyn tweets about her latest love, selling trinkets for Alex and Ani. If I were bonus mom Robyn I would be very upset Aspyn is not selling MSWC to her sorority sisters...



Here's a tweet from Janelle. How tranquil, but at first I thought it was a forest fire. You know what, I still think it's a forest fire...Run fer yer life, Mr. Fisherman!!!
Alas, Janelle couldn't be with the fisherman of her dreams because she had to pick up the slack left by the TLC intern on their official TLC Facebook fanpage. Thank you for answering the question of the decade "What is a cube of butter?"



And another thanks to Janelle for retweeting this bit of Mormon history...


I love how Janelle let it be known that no one from the Brown's Kamp travelled to Iowa to cheer Hunter at his wrestling match.

Hmmmm....Isn't it funny how Janelle chose to take a picture of this city at night? Almost like she didn't want us to know where she was...Guess what, Janelle. If you don't want people to know where you are, DON'T TWEET YOU'RE TRAVELING!!!



At least Christine started tweeting pictures of Truely again.







This past Sunday, @BradyandWives showed they are getting the hang of Live tweeting...




But they could have done without the obligatory We Love Our Husband tweet...UGH!!!

And when did Kody Brown ever thank the audience for watching their show???



On the Brady and Wives family Facebook, Brady challenged fans to show him their piles (LOL).

Post by Brady and Wives.



Well Brady, here's my pile o'books... on my Kindle, of course!




So there, Mr. Philosophy Major!!!


And in case you haven't heard, there's a big hole in the TLC lineup now.

Yep, Here Comes Honey Boo Boo has gone bye bye for good...


If you missed the commotion. First, there was this 10/23/14 posting on the family FB page...Denying everything of course.


Post by Alana Thompson (Honey Boo Boo).


And then, a day later, there was this video...Guess TLC don't like playing games especially when convicted child molesters are involved...



Post by Alana Thompson (Honey Boo Boo).


Hmmm...Looks like the rumors Mama June were true about her seeking legal counsel. They most likely advised her how dumb it was to talk about her "problems" to fans. It's a shame because that video, where she announced to fans that TLC had called her that morning to tell her the show was cancelled, was priceless. Deny Deny Deny is the name of her tune...


The rest is history...

Looks like that morality clause Kate Gosselin wrote about does exist!


UPDATE 10/30/14

On a serious note: This from the Williams and TLC...



Post by Brady and Wives.





Well, that's all for now. More updates as they occur!
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Sunday, October 26, 2014

Live Tweet Party! My Five Wives for Sunday, October 26, 2014





Brady working on his Halloween mask



Are you ready for this week's Live Tweet Party in My Living Room?

That's right, you can view and join  My Five Wives live tweeting all in the comfort of My Living Room!

And you don't even need to dress up, much.





So kick off yer shoes, put on yer best Prairie Dress and sharpen up yer snark.

Join the Party and Let the snarking begin!!









But first...


Hmmm....I wonder what Brady is referring to in these tweets????













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Tuesday, October 21, 2014

Memories: Oldie but Goodie Tweets from the Browns

I'm not going to sugarcoat this. It's been slim pickings on the Brown Family's tweets. Maybe they are tired of their tweets being analyzed, who knows. But it sure tells their fans just how much they care...

I decided, hey. If the Browns won't tweet new stuff to their fans, I'll go back into my files and find those early tweets (and some Facebook stuff) they forgot existed. Or deleted.

For example. Here's a choice oldie but goodie from a semi-newlywed (and impregnated with Sol) Robyn. You see, some mean people were saying things about her that she felt was just not right or fair! Even if it was October of 2011!!

So she went all ballistic on their collective you know whats. Funny thing, notice how she begins "Follow my Sister Wives and build them up..." but quickly gets back to the point that SHE's just a victim of bad editing and an evil editor. And everyone wants to be her friend.

Ahh...Right....


Here's a subtle reminder why many fans stopped liking Robyn that first season in 2010. Yep, knowing that Kody was rushing to be with Christine who was about to give birth to Truely, Robyn chose that time to passionately kiss her husband to be. Problem was, according to Christine, no kissing is allowed prior to the marriage ceremony. Editing had nothing to do with this faux pas. And let's not forget her trying to hide from her sister wives the fact that Kody chose her wedding dress, her supersized wedding and honeymoon, not to mention her keeping that honeymoon alive by making sure she got more time with Kody than any of his other wives, combined.



So I suppose the moral of this story is, with a Sister Wife like Robyn, who needs enemies?

Remember this tweet? Here's a fan that called out the fact that Kody was only following Robyn on Twitter. Interesting that the fan chose to tweet her question to Janelle, who immediately went into "Stand by Your Man" mode  in order to explain away why that occurred. And save some face.




Yep,  Kody is emotion savvy all right! His reply definitely showed that...



Back in the early days, the Browns appeared to tweet freely about the upcoming season without the firm hand of TLC guiding their way. Notice the subtle technique Kody and Meri used to generate suspense...Oh, and they were on vacation in Mexico while tweeting, too!





Of course, while Kody and Meri was in Mexico (on TLC's dime because it was filmed for the show) this is how Robyn let her fans know she was lonesome, poor lost soul....




We all wondered exactly what "work" Robyn needed a break from...oh yeah, being a Sister Wife and knowing Kody was living it up in Mexico with Meri!!

Hmmm....I wonder if Rosie ever showed up for dinner?



Here's a lunch date that did materialize...Can you just feel those passive aggressive jabs at Christine and Janelle? A little too much "Oh we have sooooo much fun together"-ness if you ask me!




They may not have gotten a photo op with Rosie, but their booking agent was able to get the Browns (sans Robyn) a picture with none other than Carrot Top!! Well Zlist is better than no list I suppose...



OOOOH!!!! More bonding time between Meri and her best bud Robyn...my my, have the times changed...



I guess the "begging for quarters" was another way the Browns financed their McMansions!!!


Remember how Meri used to call Kody lover? THAT hasn't happened in a long time. But she did acquire that nasty VLL obsession that's occupied her twitter time the past year or so...




Sadly, Kody's tweets about Christine are no longer as "loving" or appreciative. Makes me think maybe a ghost-tweeter wrote these tweets...



Nowadays, Christine still occasionally sends out tweets like this, but usually she's with her kids and Kody is nowhere to be found...




Finally, Meri (aka the First and Legal Wife of Kody Brown and Don't You Ever Forget It!!) made sure her many twitter followers (including her best bud and sisterwives Robyn, Christine and Janelle) saw this announcement that not only was she home from Mexico, that she and Kody had a wonderful time...alone!!




And here's this wonderful nugget from the early days of their family friend run Facebook book page that only "vetted" friends could enjoy. This was Robyn's response to a fan who wanted to know what was happening with their plans to start a gym called Fundamental Fitness.



Talk about loose lips sinking ships! And unless their TLC handlers were "friends" with the family friend (actually a friend of Robyn's) they never saw this faux pas. You see, Robyn's comment contradicted the storyline presented on the show. That is, after bringing in a investor (who mysteriously disappeared along with business partner Trainer Bill during a season hiatus) Kody was shown dropping the plans for Fundamental Fitness and going with My Sister Wives Closet instead.

And that's when TLC started to control the Brown Krew with an iron hand and that Robyn lovefest of a fanpage became extinct. Pity...

That was 2012. What a difference almost three years can make!!
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Sunday, October 19, 2014

Live Tweet Party My Five Wives Sunday October 19, 2014





Are you ready for this week's Live Tweet Party in My Living Room?

That's right, you can view and join  My Five Wives live tweeting all in the comfort of My Living Room!

And you don't even need to dress up, much.




Tonight is the second season premiere of My Five Wives!

So kick off yer shoes, put on yer best Prairie Dress and sharpen up yer snark.

Let the snarking begin!!


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Sunday, October 12, 2014

UPDATED!! Off Topic Sunday for October 12, 2014


I can't have a baby without funding for MSWC, Kody!
Even though Robyn Brown has been kept under the radar all summer, occasionally her keepers let her up for a minute or two in order to breathe some "fresh air".

For example, while it was a vacationing fan who tipped off stateside fans that Kody and Robyn were enjoying themselves in Hawaii, Kody basically confirmed his location on a retweet. Whether this was intentional or accidental...well, we ARE talking Kody Brown, right?

Anyway, it was also Robyn's birthday this week. Strange how all her sister wives wished her a good one...talk about planned. But it just goes to show how Robyn is getting older and older, and still no new Kody bun in her quickly aging oven.

Or is there?


Of course there's no holding back Meri on Twitter when Mariah makes her way back to the cul-de-sac.


And Meri has to support her favorite band...strange no pictures of the band or her friends. Hmm...



Here's one of the latest tweets from Meri...but the picture is devoid of any adults. If I didn't know better, I'd think they were hiding something...hmmm...




Look at this! Mariah has a fan!!




Mariah, home at last...
I suppose it is better than sleeping on a cold sidewalk or the desert...

Meanwhile, over at Maddie's school...


Honey, those profs know exactly who's who in their classes. Especially when the student is followed by 2 cameramen, 4 producers and a hair/makeup person!

Of course he won't... Don't be surprised if he wants to have a meeting with you in his office to discuss your grade. Oh, and don't forget to bring the film crew with you to guarantee that "A"!!

While we are on the topic of naivete...there's this tweet from Mykelti. Ah yes, the joys of dating. Don't forget what your dad Kody told you about those hormones when you're swapping spit with some guy!


Update 10/13/14, looks like Mykelti deleted her tweet. So I'll be positive (or possitive in Kody speech) and say the dude finally texted her back with the news she wanted to hear! </positive>


As usual, Kody spent his time retweeting...but he did respond to a tweet while he was vacationing with Robyn in Hawaii... (His location is cleverly stamped on the tweet...funny how his other tweets don't have that location stamp...hmmm...)

Yeah, yeah. And you don't want them to kiss because of those hormones in spit. Frankly, I'd be more worried about those damn viruses and bacteria that live in the human mouth than hormones but that's just me!

Looks like Janelle has taken a cue from Teresa and Juicy Joe having the book thrown at them for not filing taxes and bankruptcy fraud. But isn't the deadline October 15th? Talk about procrastination! Hey Janelle, why don't you hire Teresa and Joe's tax accountant to help you out??? [insert evil laugh here]
This tweet about Janelle cooking is kind of confusing...but it sounds like she's doing more than just putting butter and coconut oil in her coffee...
Now here is a sweet tweet to Robyn...but...doesn't that last sentence sound like a back-handed compliment ???

And happy happy joy joy for Janelle...Looks like Maddie made it home for the weekend after all.

I have it on good authority that Janelle tweeted the next two tweets for all of us (especially CPA Carol) to enjoy!!!



On the other polygamist fronts, looks like there's a lot of showing off offsprings going on...

First the Dargers and their grandchild...


Post by The Darger Family.






Then we have Ezra Hammon from Polygamy USA fame, showing off the newest edition to his family on his Facebook, of course...

Can't wait for his eyebrows to grow in, just like his dad and granddad ole Uncle Art...


The Hammon Men Looking Fierce, Polygamist Style


And of course, Brady Williams' wife Robyn showing off their 21 year old daughter on the family run Facebook fanpage...


Post by Brady and Wives.




On their official  Facebook fanpage, TLC wants to make sure no one forgets the new season premieres next Sunday, October 19th...


Post by My Five Wives.



UPDATE UPDATE UPDATE UPDATE UPDATE UPDATE

UPDATE FOR 10/13/14

Janelle may be 6 months late filing her taxes, but she's a month early in her Thanksgiving wishes. And her Recommit dress isn't looking any better in that photo, either...



Post by Sister Wives.


Janelle also tweeted about her sons Hunter, Garrison and Gabriel. First, it was Gabriel's birthday on 10/11, Garrison is a sophomore in high school, attending Homecoming with a date, and Hunter attended Senior Homecoming with his date. I wonder if Hunter and Garrison were given the hormone speech from Kody?










Attention Attention Attention!!!
 
The Live Tweet Party Room is now...
 
OPEN!!!




That's all for now. Watch for new updates as they occur!
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Monday, October 6, 2014

It's the 2014 Plyggie Awards!!




Welcome everyone to the first ever Plyggie Awards!

Before we start the award presentations, let's enjoy a musical interlude from Utah's finest house band, and the choice band of Meri Brown...Give it up for VAN LADY LOVE!!!

(Warning: Typical Utah cover band music. Play at your own risk)



Let's give out the first award, shall we?

The candidates for this award were the strongest we've ever seen. In fact, each had a look that could stop a clock dead at 20 paces.

They were:

Paulie "I Pay The Bills, B****" Williams

Nonie "Don't Change Me!(cuz I'm cray cray)" Williams











and...

Robyn "Don't Call Me Sweetie" Brown
For The Overall Best, Worst Example of a Sisterwife having a Resting Bitch Face, the award goes to.... Robyn Brown!! A landslide at that!

Come on down here and collect your hard earned 'Plyggie' while we show some more examples of your best work!




Who can forget Robyn's face while she waited "patiently" for Mona the Psychic to finish with Kody. Guess she didn't like that prediction about Kody bringing in a 5th.





Now this was from the first season of Sister Wives, after Kody carelessly told Meri, Janelle and a shocked Christine how he chose Robyn's wedding dress.

It's interesting how Robyn faulted Kody for telling the truth rather than herself for secretly going behind her future sisterwive's backs by having Kody decide about the dress.




But my favorite has to be the royal "We are not amused" face Robyn sported after Christine had her way with her during the taping of the Tell All episode this last season.

Suffice to say if looks could kill, Christine would be cooling her jets in the Celestial Kingdom if Robyn had her way! But her hair looked FABULOUS!



The next category is...

The Overall Best, Worst Case of Conspicuous Consumption by a Polygamist Family

The lucky candidates were...

The 72 oz Steak Challenge - Kody Brown Family

The ReCommitment Ceremony - Kody Brown Family



I love when Kody looks like he's about to upchuck...don't you?









Kody gives klowns and the need to ReCommit a bad name...









and of course...those lovely oversized, cheaply made barns collectively known as The Kody Brown McMansions behind the Gated Cul-de-Sac...

Aerial Map of the Cul-de-sac Courtesy Bing.com


And the Award For The Overall Best, Worst Case of Conspicuous Consumption by a Polygamist Family goes to...The Kody Brown McMansions!

Kody, come on down and collect your 'Plyggie' while you still can!

While we wait for Kody to gather his wits (and his wives) here's a brief replay of the history of the Kody's McMansions.



The McMansions were born out of the need for Kody to provide each of his four wives a home so that they would not have to bump butts in the kitchen with Meri. At least that's what Kody told a disbelieving Papa Joe Darger and his three wives - who make do in one kitchen under one roof in a house about the same size of one McMansion.







And who can forget the sight of a jubilant Kody, leaving his scent in the dirt around the four cul-de-sac lots.











Who would've thunk from such humble beginnings...








Kody Brown would eventually end up in these four truly awful representations of the American Dream, Polygamist style.

No Day Job...Three Million Dollars in Mortgages...No Worries, right Kody?




Next up...


The Overall Best, Worst Case of Loose Lips Sinking Ships

The candidates were...


Rebecca Richard



Meri may not do weird, but according to Rebecca she knows polygamist that do. I suppose a husband and his wives sharing a bed together saves on having to buy bedroom furniture for each wife, right?







Kody "I Picked Out Robyn's Wedding Dress" Brown


and, of course...

Christine "I'm A Great Liar" Brown



And the Award for The Overall Best, Worst Case of Loose Lips Sinking Ships goes to...Christine Brown!  Hands down, baby!!!

While Christine slowly makes her way through the crowd of monogamist sharks and toasters, let's take a look at some of her better Loose Lips moments....




Who can forget Christine's proud proclamation that she was the family liar while playing goofy golf a couple of seasons ago?










Or how she "playfully" mentioned at the mortgage application meeting how she sometimes forgets to pay important bills. You know, like electricity, water, rent...THOSE kind of bills.










But her most egregious acts of loose lips occurred this last season when she...

 1) Told the venture capitalists that if given too much money for My Sisterwife's Closet, the Browns may not want to work hard...


and...






2) Proudly proclaimed in the Route 66 road trip episode that "Plygs like free stuff..." She also chuckled how a Route 66 restaurant had to clean up their mess left over from Truely's birthday party.





Yes siree, Christine is certainly a positive voice for Polygamy world-wide!

Next up are the categories honoring those wonderful supporting characters that appeared in polygamist reality shows.

Lets honor the important second fiddlers!!

The candidates for The Overall Best, Worst Performance of a Female Polygamist in a Supporting Role were...




Rebecca "Thompson" from Polygamy, USA

A bit flirty and playful, she loves her wine and playing card games with her sister wife Marlene.








Also from Polygamy, USA we have Kellie "Thompson". According to her faith, when asked by the Brethren who she wanted as her mate in this life and the afterlife, she told them the lucky guy was the good-looking Hyrum "Burton". After a short courtship, they were married. Oh, and she giggles, a lot...



and...



Rosemary Williams, who just never seemed to get a break. If it wasn't Paulie interrupting her night with Brady (Paulie's window was stuck...) it was Brady being "concerned" about her being overweight. It just seemed like Rosemary was forever getting the short end of the quality time with Brady stick last season...




Now this was a real close vote, with only one point separating the winner from 2nd place. Yep, looks like...

The Award for the Overall Best, Worst Performance of a Female Polygamist in a Supporting Role goes to Rosemary Williams!

The next category is...

The Overall Best, Worst Performance of a Male Polygamist in a Supporting Role.

And the 'Plyggie' goes to the late Winn Brown !



No doubt this man not only played a part in making Kody what he is today, but he obviously saw through Kody's façade early on. Isn't it ironic that the one story Kody related about Winn was when  his father gave him a pair of thermal underwear instead of a Letterman's sweater he wanted.  Giftwrapped in a Letterman's sweater box.

Before we tackle the last two categories, let's take a look at High Fashion: Polygamist Style!







Polygamy, USA


Michael Cawley and two of his wives showing the audience their Sunday Best...














Polygamy, USA

Marlene "Thompson" putting all us monogamist harlots on notice that not only does she have legs that go on for miles, she can rock a pair of eight inch platform heels, too.





But the polygamists with the most questionable fashion sense has got to be those Merry Wives of Kodydom...Kody, Meri, Christine, Robyn and Janelle!!!




Meri completely disregarded the Polygamist's Motto: Modest is Hottest in this unfortunate photo.



And it's apparent that although Kody "lives" out of four separate homes, not one has an iron he could use on his forever wrinkled shirts.









Off the show, Meri was photographed wearing this turquoise bandage dress with a black shrug and black leggings...

Oy vey...












Christine tends to go for the layered look. Which would be OK if you're a prepubescent teenager...








And Robyn (courtesy of her best bud from the San Francisco road trip) thinks she is a fashionista...ummmm...we don't think so.






But what exactly was Meri and Janelle thinking when they wore these fashion faux pas to the ReCommit Ceremony?



Brain bleach, anyone????



Now for our last two categories!

The candidates for The Overall Best, Worst Performance of a Female Polygamist in a Leading Role were...

Nonie Williams

She works for hubby Brady's company so she sees him more often than his other wives. When sisterwife Rhonda decided to adopt, Nonie one upped her by wanting another baby, too. The old fashion way with Brady, demanding even more of Brady's time.

Robyn Brown
 
 
On the San Francisco trip, Robyn cheerfully modeled designer clothes (about 2 fashion seasons old) that were way too small for her dumpy sister wives to wear.

and

Meri Brown

Her nonchalantly cleaning her counter top while Kody was on the phone telling her Truely was in kidney failure was "iconic".

The Award for the Overall Best, Worst Performance of a Female Polygamist in a Leading Role goes to...Meri Brown!!

While Meri elbows her way through the crowd to collect her 'Plyggie', let's take a look at the many faces of Meri...






























Meri, you know you deserve this 'Plyggie' so quit your sniveling. You can go back to tweeting about VanLadyLove in a few minutes, OK???



Last but certainly not least, we have the final category...


The Overall Best, Worst Performance of a Male Polygamist in a Leading Role.


There were only two contenders:

From Polygamy, USA - Michael Cawley





His version of bedtime stories implanted the lurid vision of monogamist harlots walking the streets in his children's impressionable minds. And who could forget his "bright" idea to house his excess progeny in shipping containers placed in his backyard? Applesauce anyone?


and

The totally unforgettable (and I know you've tried)...

KODY BROWN from Sister Wives!!





And the award goes to...by a friggin' LANDSLIDE!!!

The man who appears in 99% of the scenes shown on his reality show named for his wives. The man whose ego knows no boundaries. Who thinks his jewelry designs are "iconic" and therefore deserving of the ridiculously high price he has placed on them. Who suckered not only four women to marry him, but four mortgage companies to finance his 'McMansions in a Gated Cul-de-Sac Dream' located in Las Vegas, his Plymouth Rock of the West! Yep, we are talkin'...

KODY BROWN !!

Get your middle-aged flabby buns on down here!

As Kody slowly makes his way through the crowd, carrying son Sol with one arm while shoving away his adoring fans with the other...

Let's take a look at Kody showing us what he does best!

















Nothing can follow that Brown mess!

And that concludes the 'Plyggie Awards' for 2014 !!! Many thanks to everyone taking the time to vote!!!

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